I wonder what makes some people think that, whatever their decision in a relationship, they're not accountable to their partner. Not for all types of decisions but some decisions.
If we're in a relationship, something that we do which can affect the relationship should be properly considered whether it may affect your partner rather than doing it just because YOU THINK THAT YOU LIKE IT AND YOU DON'T MIND. I find that to be bullshit. In a relationship, it's never just about you. It's about you AND the person you're with.
Every decision, every flirt attempt with another person, every word said to another person. It's all accountable be it just fooling around or serious. Almost everything we do that may, even indirectly, involve your partner, has to be taken into deep consideration such as going out with another person of the opposite sex or even an unexplainable sudden long conversation on the phone with a person of the opposite sex. Most of you would think "well, it's all about trusting your partner." Why do you think most couples would AT LEAST inform his/her gf/bf as to who they're going out with or where they're going? It's not that we're forced to report. It's just a sense of commitment to another person. And it's not like we don't or choose not to trust our partners, but, there must be something that can assure us that we can continue to place our trust. There are people who had been affected by lost of trust and they tend to need more assurance.
Trust builds. It's not created or granted overnight.
As an example I used to give to some people: If I'm in a relationship but I'm out with another person of the opposite sex, I tend to inform my gf. It's not that I'm someone's bitch or something, but it's just rightful to do so because I don't want to abuse the trust of the person I love. Secondly, I would mostly only go out with someone who's also in a relationship to avoid any misunderstanding or any difficulties of dealing with jealousy. It's also to avoid myself from falling for that person when I know that person also has a bf.
The person constantly going out for movies with me is also only doing so because her bf can't spend adequate time with her. Even after all the unhappiness she feels, she still informs him about who she's going out with and where.
If there's one despicable thing I won't do, is that I won't flirt with someone else's gf. Don't even mention about stealing someone's gf or even convincing that person to break up. Everyone deserves a chance to try to be together unless it's certain cases that it's obvious the girl shouldn't be with that certain guy. But that would be a serious case,i.e. abuse, threats, etc.
If a person continues to subject his/her partner with issues that may break a person's trust, then I really think this person has never really thought about his/her partner and consider the consequences. I used to trust the person I love until she breaks that trust after I had given several warnings to ensure the trust I place isn't affected. But unfortunately, it's still abused. Now I won't place total trust in the next person I love until after a while being together.
Like I said before, if your partner doesn't care, then better question where do you stand in his/her priority and life.
Monday, August 04, 2008
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1 comment:
I absolutely agree with what you said. But some how I can't be bothered telling some people about it. They've already made up their minds whether or not they'll tell their partner about them going out with the opposite sex alone or with his/her friends anyway(the opposite sex's friends). Since they've already made up their minds on what they want to do and refuse to change, I figured that I'll just leave them alone to think why they're suffering the fate of losing their partner all the time. With people like this, it doesn't matter how great their bfs/gfs are, they won't be able to see that they only have themselves to blame, and they'll go on blaming other people and saying that their ex aren't as good as they thought they are.
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